So probably the biggest challenge of a deployment is making everyday different. I don't have any children in school and I don't work, so we can basically do whatever we want. The problem is actually getting there. Max gets bored easily, and when he's bored he turns into this:
So getting out of the house or doing different activities every day is necessary for survival pretty much. He's also 2.5, so sometimes if he doesn't want to go anywhere, it can seriously take up to 45 minutes to get him ready. Anyone that knows Max can back me up on this. That kid does not willingly do a single thing he doesn't want to do. This is what happens when you disrupt him from his activities to get him dressed:
About a week or so before Brandon left, Max smashed my iPad so we made plans to go up to the Apple Store after Brandon got home from work to get it fixed. Max's clothes were dirty and needed to be changed, but he was playing with his trains and was all STEP OFF. Brandon pulled into the driveway about 20 minutes into trying to get him dressed and could hear the screaming outside. He thought that something terrible was happening, but no, Max is just a boss.
He's very big for his age, and very strong. As soon as I get one leg in his pants it's out, and he's mastered head butting me while trying to get his shirt on. Then there is actually getting him in his car seat. Sometimes I have to pretty much lay on him to get him to stay still enough to get him buckled in.
It doesn't phase me too much anymore....his tantrums were definitely the hardest part of Brandon's last deployment. I've discovered (the hard way) that the quickest way to end a tantrum is to ignore it. Tantrums feed on attention, and when they don't get it, they go away. Max's tantrums have slowly been becoming less intense and less frequent, but still happen when we have to be somewhere at a specific time (of course). So that's basically the long version of why my schedule has been thrown out the window and we just play it by ear.
So Brandon is gone again. We have two babies this time, so I get asked a lot if it's harder, or if I'm scared, etc. Frankly, it's not much harder this time than the last time. Max is better behaved and Liam is a perfect baby and (at the moment) not mobile, so we're making it. It's still just as lonely and I'm still sleep deprived (maybe more so this time, what with an infant and all), but we're making it.
I'm also not very scared. Of course I worry about the what if, but bad things could happen at any time to any of the people I love. Being scared all the time of something that most likely won't happen isn't fair to Brandon or our boys. My Sunday School teacher a few months ago was relating a conversation he had with someone about our relationship with Christ and how it needs to be the most important relationship in our lives, even more important with the relationship we have with our spouse. He said that at first he scoffed at that, but then his wife got sick and wasn't herself anymore. Our spouses won't always be around, but Christ will. I can't talk to Brandon whenever I want...I can email him and wait for phone calls, but that's it. I can, however, always pray and read my scriptures. I'm not afraid of anything happening, because if it does I know we will be okay. It will be hard and sad, but we'll be okay. This is our fourth deployment, and we've always been okay.